Year in Review of NYC's baked good offerings.

In preparation for my year-in-baking wrap-up post(s) here are some of the places in NYC I tried this past year for baked goodies. Some were good, some disappointing, and all were an experience in their own way. I'm pretty sure I gained some cavities along the way, but well earned I say! Cupcake Stop aka the Cupcake Truck

I tried several cupcakes from the ever mobile dessert truck (not to be confused with The Dessert Truck). Their lemon raspberry wasn't as good as the one I've made. Decent but not lemony enough for my taste. Their red velvet was better than some (Magnolia you really disappoint me!) and they had a chocolate peanut butter cupcake that was good. I don't know how good stuff keeps from there, but the cupcakes weren't as super moist as I'd expect the day of.

They also offer mini cupcakes at $1/each, which may be a good buy if you just want to have a little taste.

Milk Bar

Love, love, love Milk bar! Their cookies are amazing! I tried their dulce de leche cake which was heavy as heck and a bit dry. So I'd recommend the cookies. My faves are the compost cookie (with chocolate, marshmallow, corn flakes, and pretzels) and the blueberry creme. So freakin' good I took an extra long lunch break to buy some for dinner. Dinner!

Tribeca Treats

Better than average cupcakes and their pumpkin is mighty good. They lost some of my good graces because I kept calling ahead for the pumpkin cupcake and getting denied when I showed up at the store (seems they make small batches day-by-day) but overall I've had a couple of their cupcakes and given some to friends who have been impressed. Plus, their cupcakes are mighty reasonable in Manhattan at $2/each.

Their brownies are spectucular, but are overpriced at $2/each for the tiny size you get.

Sugar Sweet Sunshine

A former co-worker introduced my friends and I to this spot and it's become a fave since. The only cupcake I truly enjoy from here is their pumpkin, which they offer year-round! So a big plus in my book. Their claim to fame is their buttercream icing and varied flavors of cupcakes, so I'd highly recommend. Also quite cheap at $1.50/each, so splurge people, splurge!

Butter Lane

My was I highly disappointed after this place. And thankfully I have a rock hard stomach so it doesn't upset easily. I happened to pass by this place from having lunch with a friend and figured "why not?" I should've kept moving.

Butter Lane is known for it's freshly made, organic buttercream icings and that's pretty much it. The place has a lovely decor but their cupcakes are disappointing and look/feel kind of hard. Also disappointing is that their cupcakes are named for the icing only. So I picked up a pumpkin cupcake thinking I was getting a pumpkin cupcake, but all I was getting was a golden cupcake with pumpkin icing. And such is the same for ALL their cupcakes. They either have golden or chocolate cupcakes and many types of homemade icing. The icing was good, the cupcake was not and I don't purchase cupcakes just for the icing so I probably won't go here again. Also their cupcakes are $3/each a bit hefty considering you're paying for the icing mainly.

Crumbs

I've loved crumbs since I first had it several years ago and that didn't stop this year either. They have a fluffy moist cake in various sizes (tiny, regular, and ginormous!) They have various flavors year round and I've received pretty darn good service from the ones around the city. The regular cupcakes are reasonable at $2.95/each and the massive ones even more reasonable at $3.95/each.

Fay Da Bakery

A nice Asian bakery in Chinatown where you can get Asian desserts or savory treats like pork buns, chicken buns, etc. I particularly liked their rolls. Their vanilla roll and lemon rolls are delicious and reasonable. A big one costs about $11 and an individual one would be a little over $1.

Dessert Truck

How I miss thee! They had amazing goodies like homemade donuts (with jelly), hot chocolate (as thick as pudding and very tasty!), and a chocolate mousse that made me curl my toes in delight! Woowee! Unfortunately something about permits deterred the Dessert Truck from making a resurgence for most of the year, but at least I had that bit and it was lovely!

Crepateria

Since the two locations aren't located that far from me in Queens it's nice to know I can get crepes any time I want! Sweet or savory take your pick, but I have to say I love the warm cinnamon apple crepe with ice cream or banana and nutella (staples at most crepe shops). Good and good for you!

Royale Bakery

Tried a chocolate cupcake and sea salt brownie. The brownie was quite good I have to say. The salt did not over power the sugary & chocolatey goodness of the colossal sized brownie I had. The cupcake was okay. A bit dry (which tends to be a consistent problem at bakeries) but the peanut butter icing was very good. Plus, the lady at the counter was very knowledgeable and kind about telling my husband and I about the different choices. I also liked how they put the cupcakes in cups (upside down) so as not to smoosh them in transit. I'd recommend.

Grom

A co-worker enthusiastically told me about Grom and one day while strolling around West 4th Street and 6th Avenue on a summer's day I just waltzed right in. Grom serves freshly made gelato in various flavors. I had the plan vanilla which was quite good. The small (one scoop) is pricey at $5 but it is good for the money.

Grand Daisy

This Italian staple became a growing chain when another one opened up just a block or two from my building. They have lots of breads, sandwiches, pizzas, and desserts! One of my favorites is the tortino di cioccolata (aka chocolate tart aka big ol' brownie) delicious. They also have a good sandwich cookie which is two butter cookies with nutella in the middle. They also have tortes (tarts/cakes) and bread pudding! The slices of tarts and cakes is a bit pricey, but individual cookies are pretty good at $3 each considering their size. A slice of their bread pudding would run you $6. I have yet to take the plunge and keep going to Whole Foods for their bread pudding that I can get at $3 or less.

Once upon a tart

I have yet to try the tarts here, but had a couple of their humongous cookies! Pretty good and reasonably priced for such large confections. I'd say their chocolate chip is better than their peanut butter. Though I will be returning to try their pear tart that just looks darling from its place perched high in their window.

Sweet Melissa Patisserie

In the heart of family friendly area of Park Slope (there's also a location in Carol Gardens, Brooklyn) sits a cute patisserie started by a lovely lady who seems to enjoy pumpkin as much as I do. I tried the pumpkin bread pudding with caramel rum raisin glaze/icing and loved it. It's not as mushy as your typical bread pudding, more cake like in it's look and portions. But warm with the glaze it is very satisfying. My husband bought me the Sweet Melissa Baking book after we tried her tasty goods. I can't wait to go back when we just happen to be in the area.

I look forward to retrying some of these places and trying many new ones.

Review: Beautiful Black Hair

At this years Book Expo in New York City I made a point to pass by the Amber Books booth in the African-American pavilion to see what they had. After going to BEA for the past several years in NYC I recall seeing Amber Books booth catering to an African-American demographic with books focused on how to get financial help for school, various beauty books, and biographies on popular African-American entertainers. A book I was particularly interested in, but wasn't available was one on Black Skin Care. But what did catch my eye was Beautiful Black Hair by Shamboosie. As someone who's always looking to improve and learn more about ensuring the health of my hair I was intrigued, and quickly purchased it at a discount. I read the book weeks later and couldn't believe how intuitive it was. At the same time I sighed with indignation at the faulty advice previous hair care "professionals" had given me while at in the same breath being relieved that my current stylist's protocol seems to be very much in line with what Shamboosie preached in Black Hair.

Black hair care is a huge industry, filled (like any business) with good and bad products, as well as people who are knowledgeable and those who aren't.  Beautiful Black Hair reflects the accumulated knowledge of a hair care professional to females--practically calling out to us--to pay attention and take better care of our hair.

After reading Black Hair I couldn't help but think back to previous stylists and the ridiculous information they gave me when I started getting my hair chemically treated as a pre-adolescent.  My last hairstylist went from working in a salon in midtown Manhattan to operating out of her own home, not something unheard of in NYC. She told me to wash my hair every two weeks and that Pink hair care products were wonderful. Instead of saying she wasn't sure she told me to continue doing what I was doing rather than providing step-by-step advice on how not to dry my hair out, get rid of a flaky scalp, or keep my hair silky smooth. I'm lucky that my transition from Curl to Relaxer didn't make me bald in her care. At one point I was combing out large clumps of hair because she refused to do the research or ask advice to get me the right information to take proper care of my hair (stylist pride to the detriment of a client is something Shamboosie touches on in his book as well). As far as my then stylist was concerned Denorex was an excellent product to rid me of dry scalp and maintain a nice luster. She urged me to put Pink setting lotion (an extremely thick and greasy product) into my hair which did not help matters.

The last draw with this stylist came when she overused hairspray on my hair the day prior to my wedding to keep the style in. Rather than showing me how to accurately wrap my hair and brush it out in the morning she sprayed half a can of Ultra Sheen (yes, that big ole red can of chemicals that put a whole in the Ozone). Those who've used this popular product know it is not a lightweight product and makes your hair stiff as a rock. After my shower the next morning as I took my hair out of my scarf I noticed I could barely comb through it. As I did I had limp and stiff strands envelope my face completely negating the work done on my hair the night before. I cried in my fiance's arms and had to pin my hair back. Guests were kind, but I still didn't have the signature look I craved even for my small wedding.

Reading Black Hair may make you want to sigh with relief (as I do now) at having a conscientious hair stylist or wring your hands in anger at those who've provided misguided information to you (like the woman I mentioned above). Everything Shamboosie writes makes sense. And don't fret entirely if you feel the latter, hair can be salvaged if taken care of, conditioned & washed regularly.

First things first, wash regularly! It may seem like common knowledge, but by the information I was given obviously it is not depending on your background. Next, get good conditioners and shampoos that moisturize your hair as well as protect it. Many products out their specialize in retaining color, removing dandruff, neutralizing chemicals, protecting your hair from sun damage, etc. But it is important that not only do these products protect your hair for whatever specific situation you're in, but that they moisturize your hair as well. Shamboosie provides a chemical breakdown as well as a follicle breakdown on what parts of our hair are affected by what products and how base differs from acid. All important things to know as you go through his book and pick up his references. You learn more as he explains and understand the why as well. This makes you the reader more capable to ask specific questions of a future or current stylist to know how much they are working off of what they've been taught or truly understand Black hair care.

CHEMICAL RELAXER

Shamboosie's emphasis, for those of us who get our hair relaxed, is to make sure our stylist is using a Conditioning Lye Relaxer that keeps hair silkier and allows it to absorb the moisture from the conditioners being released. No Lye, apparently, is bad news, capable of damaging your hair and drying it out. Upon some research at my local pharmacies and hair care stores all I could find available for over-the-counter purchase were No Lye relaxers. Not good apparently. He also does not recommend doing relaxers at home unless you are a certified professional. Considering that it seems No Lye relaxers (Dark & Lovely, Silk Elements, Luster's, Motions, Soft Sheen, etc.) are all that is available to customers that aren't certified this builds his argument.

He outlines proper relaxer application techniques so that you know if the chemical is being applied properly to your hair and that neutralizing shampoos are a must unless you want the chemical to continue eating at your hair leaving you bald. I understood why my stylist shampoos my hair with neutralizing shampoo at least three times--to ensure that the chemical is out of my hair.

COLOR

Shamboosie encourages women to do different things with their hair, but to also be careful. In particularly for those who color and chemically treat their hair for curls or relaxer. ONLY get these two treatments done in the same day if you are using a permanent hair color on gray hair that is less than 30% (meaning 30% of your hair has gray hair spread evenly throughout the scalp). Otherwise  space the dye and relaxer treatments out by a decent amount of time so that your hair is not being double, or even worse, triple processed (meaning several chemicals are in your hair at the same time). One of the longest chapters in Black Hair is dedicated to proper coloring and how to go about it.  He again refers to the pH scale, the color wheel (why certain primary and secondary colors promote a nice tone for what you want in your hair), and proper application.

Shamboosie also delves into hot irons, weaves & wigs, and tips on maintaining natural hair while also considering the steps of going from natural to chemical or vice versa. There's even a Q&A section in the back with, what one can assume, are commonly asked questions many of which are answered throughout the book.

The one negative about this book is that it was printed in 2006 and it doesn't look like reprints have updated information in regards to suggestions for new hair products you can find in lieu of ones mentioned by Shamboosie when he first compiled them. But what is important is that the core information still applies.

The amount of information is abundant, but helpful and should be applied as soon as possible. And whether you get all or some of the treatments he mentions done to your hair I suggest reading it from cover to cover to get a full understanding of how treatments can relate to each other and just in case you may have an inkling to branch out and try something new.

Here are some of my favorite products to use where I have seen/felt results:

• Joico's Moisturizing Shampoo and Conditioner: My current stylist carries many Joico products including KPAX foams to protect from heat and ones to detangle hair. I find that the conditioner does a great job of detangling my hair and afterwards my hair is left feeling soft and clean. You definitely see and feel the difference from using a harsher shampoo & conditioner that may focus purely on cleaning and getting rid of dandruff.

• Keracare's Dry & Itchy Scalp Moisturizing Shampoo & Conditioner: a medicated shampoo and conditioner that focuses on riding the hair of flakiness, which it does very well. My stylist recommended this to me once I left my previous one and I have used this regularly ever since. Your hair is not as soft as with a full-on moisturizing shampoo and conditioner, but you definitely feel the effects of having a clean scalp. I use this on a rotational basis with moisturizing shampoos/conditioners.
• Jane Carter Solution Wrap & Roll: Again, recommended by my stylist because Jane Carter uses organic materials and little chemicals. Everything from Jane Carter--from her scalp oils to her hair sprays--smells like citrus. Her Wrap and Roll foam is great for wrapping hair right after wash and during the drying phase or after drying and you're turning in for the night. I use it regularly.
• Dudley's Creme Press: This was suggested in Beautiful Black Hair. I went to Dudley's website at Shamboosie's suggestion to see a cornucopia of products for Black hair maintenance. I bought this creme and swear by it. The creme press is to protect hair when you use a curling iron or flat iron. Make sure not to be heavy-handed with this product as it can make your hair/scalp quite greasy thereby making it dirtier faster. It has a hardened gel texture and when you rub it into your hands it becomes more greasy then creamy. But it protects your hair very well from heat also helping to lock in style a bit longer than if you used no product at all. To date my stylist has not yelled at me for overusing the flat iron and breakage is down to a minimum. So buy this if you haven't already!
• Nioxin Defining Pomade: While I was not a fan of the Nioxin Scalp/Hair Care kits (it dried out my hair severly) I do like their light-weight and fragrant pomade. It's strong, holds all day, yet when you wake up the next day to style your hair you don't have to worry about any clumping or hardened hair. Fantastic.

Feel free to let me know of any other suggestions and go out and buy Beautiful Black Hair or request that your local library get it. It's a great reference for women of any age and color.

"Outrage" over inequality and hypocrites

Early this month HBO premiered Kirby Dick's documentary on hypocrisy in government from politicians who boldly vote for anti-gay legislation while leading a closeted life as homosexuals. Outrage focuses on various politicians, many Republicans, who have been outed by members of the press, in particularly Blogactive.com founder Mike Rogers.

The outrage is over politicians who can be so strong in their convictions when it comes to voting against equal rights such as same-sex marriage, gays in the military, same-sex couples being able to adopt, AIDS/HIV funding, etc. yet have no problems with entering into a sexual relationship (be it NSA or long-term) with someone of the same sex. It boggles the mind of everyone who speaks on the matter as to how one can be so blatant when it comes to condemning a part of themselves and hiding it by living a "normal" life that is accepted among their conservative majority.

Politicians such as former Senator Larry Craig (Idaho), Representative Ed Shrock (Virginia), Jim McCrery (Louisiana), and David Dreier (California) are some of the people who have been outed on Blogactive.

Dreier is a "confirmed bachelor" who is potentially having a relationship with his chief of staff. Someone who is noted to travel with him to some exotic places.

Senator Craig may have entered into a marriage of convenience and spoke at length with Matt Lauer refuting any inkling of homosexuality in his being with his wife at his side. Both Mr. and Mrs. Craig state how ridiculous it would be to enter into a false marriage for the sole reason of helping boost his career in the Republican party.

McCrery is bashed by those who knew him way back when for having been an athiest and cursing the government for being immoral and not pushing through bills that would give gays and lesbians equal rights.  McCrery has ads starring him and his wife urging voters to trust him as a man looking out for their best interest albeit denying his compromise of his liberal standards once he got backing from the Republican party and a church financially for his political career.

One of the most disturbing stories is the ongoing one of Florida Governor Charlie Crist who continually blocks gay & lesbian equality laws and openly states that he is against marriage that is not between a man and a woman. There's been many accounts of homosexual trysts that Crist has engaged in, but because he is currently in office (and more than likely has quite some pull) those who know the truth are not willing to go on record. Crist does not agree with same-sex couples adopting children in Florida even though a Florida judge ruled it unconstitutional. Crist has seated two judges onto the Florida Supreme Court who are highly opposed to same-sex marriages. Crist has been a bachelor for a very long time getting divorced about 30 years ago after six months of marriage. He recently wed a young woman last December and is currently looking to join the U.S. senate in 2010. His website states: "He proposed and worked to pass Florida's landmark civil rights legislation, the Marvin Davies Civil Rights Act of 2003, to pursue those who engage in willful discrimination against others." Seeing that he's an advocate for civil rights but not gay rights seems hypocritical in itself.

There are some interviews with politicians who have since come out and are very relieved to have done so. Democratic representative Barney Frank (Massachussetts) admits that it is a relief to not have to hide who he is or to try to act as a moderate when it comes to gay & lesbian rights for fear that someone will think he is one. Former representative Jim Kolbe (Arizona) came out in the 1990s after being threatened by an opponent that they'd out him. Kolbe's honesty turned out to be "the most lifting experience I ever had." And further to the point he stated that friend and fellow representative John McCain didn't care about his sexuality because he thought Kolbe a good politician further stating that he "was always gonna be my friend." Hearing such uplifting remarks one would hope that others would follow suit in not only coming out of the closet but for others to openly accept them for the person they are and not the bedfellows they choose.

Former NJ governor James McGreevey concurs in the fact that finally coming out of the closet relieved him of a huge burden in having to live a double life. McGreevey connected homosexuality with lewd and disgusting behavior because of the ways he hid it. Having sex in back alleys and at rest stops enforced a feeling of wrongness that wasn't true but that he couldn't come to grips with when he was younger. It's through support and education that McGreevey can see the reasons for his shame and acknowledge how much happier and better his life is now that he's being honest with everyone, including himself.

Taking a peek at the other side Dina Mattos McGreevey was interviewed with hostile feelings being evident in her stern speech and facial expressions. "What part of my marriage was real?" she asks, wishing that McGreevey's uncertainty hadn't lead them to the alter. The women that are hidden to the fact of their husband or fiance's conflicted feelings do become victims themselves of entering into a relationship that is based on falsities from the very start.

There are comments from those who've been fighting for gay & lesbian equality to those who hid their truth away for years before being able to come "clean," their stories relay intriguing and harrowing tales of how far gay & lesbian rights still has to go across the country. One commentor piggybacks Harvey Milk's statement that if everyone came out of the closet and accepted their truth then "we'd win." It's many people's hope that with a handful more U.S. States allowing same-sex marriages and other equal rights for gay & lesbian couples and individuals that sooner (rather than later) we'll see progress all over. Which means that there'll no longer be a reason for politicians and people alike to feel a need to hide or hate.

The Postgraduate Writers Conference at VCFA (2009 Edition)

After all the inspiration that overwhelmed me, along with some bad stomachaches, from the Pan African Literary Forum last year I decided I needed to be active and continue on with another writing conference this summer. However, I decided to stay stateside.

I narrowed it down to two conferences, both of which I heard about via Poets & Writers magazine. P&W started to dedicate a section of their magazine's bi-monthly space to conferences and residencies, and the Postgraduate Writers Conference in Montpelier was one of those mentioned. I had never been farther north or east of the US, only to some parts of Ontario in Canada. And hearing that Vermont is lovely I figured it wouldn't hurt since the travel to the nation's smallest capital would be cheap, plus it wouldn't cost me as much as it would to go across the world.

One of the things that solidified my decision to attend this conference was the consistent and friendly communication from the program's director, Ellen Lesser. When I emailed people at the other conference I was interested in I got various delays in response. And when it came down to the wire for me to make my decision and know my status I didn't get an answer for a week or so and then having found out I didn't get my first (and only choice for an instructor) I was offered an opening in a genre class rather than the literary class I had requested. This subpar way of getting me to join the conference by the director to fill in some gaps irritated me because it was obvious that he didn't have any idea of what my work was about and how it wouldn't fit with the workshop he was trying to sell me on. I quickly contacted Ms. Lesser and said that I was hoping she still had an opening in her short story class. Within the day Ellen responded back and I hot-tailed it to the post office to buy stamps and send over my deposit.

The Postgraduate Writers Conference has several things going for it in my opinion:

1. Clientele: Target attendees are those with graduate degrees or in the process of getting a graduate degree. Hence they'll have familiarity with the workshop process.
2. Size: Workshop classes are no larger than 6 or so people. For a five day conference this means that people will be critiqued thoroughly and possibly have time left over for additional discussions in workshop classes. One of my classmates told me the Suwanee conference has 15 people in a workshop and at Pan African Lit Forum that number can range from as few as four to as many as ten.
3. Classes: The separation of classes from larger scale works and smaller works was a big draw. There were two workshops for novels, two for short stories, three for poetry manuscript, one for poetry, two for non-fiction, and two for YA. Not a lot of conferences split up fiction between novel and short story. Usually the two are lumped together. So knowing beforehand that someone's piece was short and being able to judge it on that made classes run smoother and more efficiently in my opinion since a larger work didn't have to be discussed (except in my and another classmates case in which we're doing linked short story collections). I do hope more conferences and perhaps even some graduate programs split the two up so people can focus more on the structure of a condense story and others on the evolvement of a larger work.
4. Location: The capital of Montpelier has a nice city in the downtown area that is only a ten minute walk down a hill from the Vermont College of Fine Arts campus. There are plenty of nice eateries in downtown Montpelier and the population there is extremely polite and helpful. Of course it's nice to have a car to go further out, but not necessary.
5. Staff: Full of reputable authors and poets there's definitely a strong roster of people who truly care about helping you develop your work and are adamant about one-on-one sessions with their students.
6. Full Schedule: This can be a good and/or bad thing. With the packed schedule for readings, lectures, workshops, additional classes, evening social events, hiking, etc. it can get pretty jam packed. What I appreciated most were the Participant readings where one could hear the work other people in other workshops were reading. This proved to be helpful in being more social when admiring someone's work a fruitful discussion on craft could commence. (Not all conferences do this for the participants and considering size it can be understandable.)
7. Cost: Compared to some conferences the cost for room, board, the conference itself, and food came in under $1200. Not including travel costs you're pretty much covered while there. And Montpelier isn't an overly pricey place either. Comparing food prices to those in NYC it's comparable or comes in less.

I think everyone has their worries when entering a workshop. Will people like my work? Will they get my work? Did they even pay attention? Will we get along over the course of the intense five days of workshops and such? And so on and so forth. Seeing that the population at the conference averaged fifty years of age it was good to find out that these people being older made them even more determined to finish their project and hone their craft. They took things seriously, which was a stark contrast to the younger generation I dealt with during my MFA program where many didn't get 70s references or deeper meaning and couldn't (or wouldn't) read between the lines. This time around I met two PhD candidates, a mom and lawyer, an entertainment professional, and a retired English high school teacher in my class who (to my surprise and amazement) read through my two stories thoroughly, providing detailed feedback and concrete advice that helped me immensely. After a while I considered my comments trite after hearing the deep readings done for my works. And our instructor Ellen Lesser proved to be the Braniac of everything! She delved so deep into our works at one point each one of us was left scratching our heads, considering her comments, while in the same breath pointing out that Ellen is a "genius."

For the first two evenings I was a bit of a hermit working on some writing I neglected for the past two months and focused on that. At the halfway point I got more involved in events and got to know my workshop mates a bit more. At different junctures in our life we all had a lot in common nonetheless. Good sense of humor, an enjoyment for letting loose through alcohol, the love of the craft and wanting to make it and ourselves better at it, love of food, and a general concensus that this conference was a really good thing for us.

In lectures I met one of the sweetest women, Sue William Silverman--A non-fiction author who got through and wrote about incest and being a sex addict. She has an affinity for pink and the brightest smile you'll ever see. Her lecture was amazing and in the end bringing up two voices (voice of innoncence and experience) as a tool for non-fiction authors to express themselves was a valuable tool for me writing a character with reminiscent narration. I also attented a lecture about the difference between YA and Adult fiction to hear author An Na break it down to voice. She believed that the voice being present in the action and that of an adult looking back and analyzing these events is the main (and not necessarily sole) difference between the two genres using The Lover and The Chosen as examples. An Na also notes that many of these can cross over to one another, but that authors need to know the difference and not just assume YA literature is "dummed down" literature for the audience. So much of it is rich and intense as is adult fiction so it's not good to assume that your audience isn't as advanced as you'd think.

I met and admired the YA classes reading from their books, the non-fiction writers delving into their lives, the poets reflecting on everything around them, and the fiction writers composing an interesting story and reading it emphatically. And I never hesitated to tell someone when I liked their work. It initiated lots of great conversation from my perspective as a person writing for a more adult audience and engaging in some deep conversation with the YA group and how hard it's been for them to create the worlds they illustrated behind the podium and on the page. I met retired women focusing on writing about subject matter important to them or exorcising their demons. I met young mothers trying to carve a certain amount of intrigue in their story to entice readers. I met men writing about talking dogs and people writing about being raised by hippie, poet parents. And I learned I needed to work on structure and not so much on voice.

I met the most amazing, generous people in a span of five days and am going through some heavy duty withdrawal I must say. I missed my bed and not having to walk down a moth-riddled hallway to the bathroom in the middle of the night (that's dorm life in the country for you). Yet, I didn't miss television. I didn't miss the day-to-day monotony of work and rush hour.

Now, I miss being embroiled in talking about writing on a regular basis. I miss hearing new work that excites me from people all over the country. I miss waking up at 7am and being served pancakes with Vermont's own maple syrup. I miss our daily workshops and readings. And I miss the bright sun beating down on the Vermont College of Fine Arts campus and slowly setting as I sit in front of my computer to plunk down my latest thoughts for my collection in MS Word.

I received a hilarious e-mail from workshop mates these past couple of days referencing things only we'd get and also crying out for the daily intake of cookies we got at lunch & dinner everyday. I'd strongly suggest going to the Postgraduate Conference in Montpelier if not for yourself then for the community because I assure you, you'll be invigorated to keep pushing yourself to get your story out there. If it's important to you it'll be important to them.

Could you be the next Food Network Star?

For the past two seasons my husband and I have been addicted to the reality show The Next Food Network Star airing, of course, on Food Network.

Now in its fifth season The Next Food Network Star has produced new Food Network shows, some memorable personalities, and many non-memorable ones.

While watching a cooking show or a food travel show, like Road Tasted with...[insert Food Network personality here], I figured it couldn't be that that hard to host a show on the network that's steadily grown and whose only focus is something we all have in common...food. I could be bubbly, humorous, quirky, extroverted, and any other adjective synonymous with out-going and likable. I could eat dish upon dish of food and explain how good it tastes. I could give people tips for how to eat on a budget. Forty dollars a day! That's easy! Having spent no more than $10 a day on food most days, I placed my fingers in a pyramid of evil and seethed that Rachel Ray could eat-my-dust.

I think many people look at or read or hear something and think to themselves: I could do better than that! Without the complete understanding of how much work and know-how (in most cases) goes into any art form. No, one doesn't have to go to the Culinary Institute to know how to make succulent chicken or moist cakes (look at FN stars Rachel Ray, Sandra Lee, Ina Garten, Paula Deen, or newest member of the FN family Aaron McCargo Jr.). Of course it doesn't hurt (see Bobby Flay, Cat Cora, or Giada DeLaurentiis). But one does need something, a certain je ne sais quoi to make the art of cooking interesting and enjoyable for those of us watching. For the host it may be work, but for the viewer it has to be entertainment and being informative couldn't hurt either.

For those of you who aren't Foodies or interested in cooking shows a la Food Network, lemme give you a quick breakdown. Various types of people and foods are represented on Food Network. They have the Southern Belle single mom who's down home comfort food has made her a staple (Paula Deen). There's the decadent woman that came into her own with natural, classic flavors and style (Ina Garten aka The Barefoot Contessa). They have a young woman with culinary expertise and close ties to her Italian heritage and family (my personal favorite personality, Giada DeLaurentiis). The city boy with a flair for keeping it real and spicy with a background of being a bit of a hard-ass (Bobby Flay). Who can't resist the knowledgeable & scientific nerd who can break down the hows and whys of food preparation (Alton Brown)? There's the blonde, overly cheerful and perhaps organizationally compulsive lady that has a place for everything and everything in its place, while helping you customize meals in a semi-homemade fashion (Sandra Lee). FN even has a place for the quirky cook who wants to make dishes quick and easy for those of us in a hurry (my least favorite personality, Rachel Ray). As time has gone on Food Network has branched out to include more ethnic differentiation from Ingrid Hoffman's Latin flair, The Neely's down-home grit, Sunny Anderson's sweet demeanor, and fourth season Food Network Star winner Aaron MacCargo Jr's "Big Daddy" mentality with big flavors.

My husband and I have tried recipes from numerous people from Food Network and various recipes from the site. We've had hits (Giada's Simple Bolognese, Sandra Lee's Cafeteria-style Mac & Cheese, the Neely's Get Yo' Man Chicken) and misses (Rachel Ray's Sesame Seed Chicken Fingers, Rachel Ray's 30-minute Coq Au Vin). We've broadened our horizons to try new dishes, work overnight to impress family & friends, and conquer simple recipes for desserts, sides, and entrees. A couple of times I've found myself pretending to talk to a camera as I folded my batter or melted my butter or marinated my chicken.

"I could definitely host my own show," I've thought to myself time and time again when a dish came out the way I anticipated.

However, watching Food Network Star it was made evidently clear that I'd probably buckle under pressure; freak out; throw stuff around the kitchen leaving a olive oil trail behind me; or vomit consistently before having to go before a TV, panel, or audience as I attempted to BS through cooking and presenting myself as a culinary expert. As we got into the fourth season of Food Network Star our egotistical thoughts were quickly shutdown at seeing people--who like us probably thought getting a show on FN would be a walk in the park--get their culinary butts kicked week after week.

Explaining a dish in 30 seconds upon tasting it? Not as easy as you may think. Words like "delicious" and "tasty" need to be removed from your lexicon. Moist, spicy, sweet yet not too sweet, bitter; these are the specific types of words that explain how food tastes to the viewer. "A hint of lemon makes all the other flavors pop out." "The musky smell from liquid smoke makes this taste like a hickory dream." Vivid. "Delicious, creamy ice cream." Not so much.

In the past two seasons of Food Network Star I have seen grown men and women cry on a regular basis. I've seen grown ups and young people alike get chewed out by Bobby Flay and Co. A comedian lost all humor as she attempted to back up her dish. And most recently a man lied under pressure so he could last at least another week, thereby throwing his partner under the bus. Of course these are amateurs! And the reality set in that I am one as well.

On Iron Chef I've never seen Chefs Flay, Morimoto, Cora, Batali, or Symon buckle under pressure. I've never seen them throw a towel at their competitor and say "F*** this!" whether the secret ingredient was apples or catfish. They went to work and a majority of the time are successful in completing the task presented to them. Even after losing the Iron Chefs are graceful and kind knowing they put their all into the five dishes they had to prepare & plate in 60 minutes or less. Now that's pressure. And if I couldn't make a signature burger or present kid-friendly veggies to a bunch of eight year olds how in the hell could I think I'd ever be able to deal with the big dogs on FN?

Food Network Star, you'd think, would be a reality check to the posers like myself who'd like to think as long as you can cook, think on your feet, and talk it'll all be gravy. We see the strongest competitors get put in their place when they're told they have to serve a dinner party of 12 on a $60 budget or that they have to make a grown up version of chicken fingers, while making a kid-friendly version of brusselsprouts or to think of and create a dish within 30 minutes. And don't get me started on the Dinner Imposible missions they have some of these people going through with tiny ovens/kitchens, limited ingredients, etc. Last season a contestant broke a glass of juice over a grill plate with food on it, duck confit no less, which ultimately became trash leading to her ouster. Oh it gets hard core, my friends. The FN Gods want to rock you to your core to make sure you-can-handle-it. And once a year only one person is deemed able to.

However, it seems if you have personality enough you may end up with a show anyway. Perhaps you'll be like last year's runner-up Adam Gertler and get a show where you're sent around the country to do odd jobs that are food-related at their own discretion because you were pretty peppy--and at times funny. Maybe you'll luck out like season three semi-finalist Nathan Lyons with his own show on FitTV. Or season 4's finalist Kelsey with a show on upstart Food2. Just because you didn't win the title, doesn't mean you're out for the count. And this is true for many reality shows like the most recent Bachelor where said bachelor picked the semi-finalist to marry instead of the "winner" or the runners-up on America's Next Top Model (one of two I've seen model at Bryant Park in Project Runway). And look at American Idol. At least half of the top ten finalists get their own record deal once the show ends for the season. You may grow with the competition leading you to better understand yourself as a potential food host. Or you can fade away and go back to the life you had beforehand.

The cards aren't always aligned to help you live your dream. And if you aren't overly interesting then you may want to kiss the chances of having your own cooking show good-bye, right quick. However, I'd like to think I'm an optimist and say that as long as you work hard at it your dreams may come true at some point. Of course, I've come to realize that I'll need a lot of preparation before I can host my own show. Needless to say, I'm not going to be quitting my day job anytime soon.